Monday, March 29, 2010

The Benefits of Being an Old Man

I am staying at the beach in San Diego for a couple days. There are a lot of "spring breakers" here.

Tonight was like any other night. At 8pm I showered and got into my sweatpants and prepared for some "Dancing With the Stars". I poured myself a glass of wine. And heck, as a little treat, I boiled some water and prepared some delicious edamames.

As I settled into the couch for the night, drinking and eating and watching (totally not fair that there is a Pussy Cat Doll in this "competition"), there was a commotion right outside my sliding glass door.

It was two gentleman engaged in a full on brawl. One of them was pummeling the crap out of the other. It was quite shocking, but also very entertaining.

I debated whether or not to go out there. On the one hand, I might get dragged into it somehow, on the other hand, I wanted to get better seats for this terrific bout.

Although I envisioned some version of this scenario:

"Hey wine faggot, what are you looking at?"

I opened the door anyway.

Some girls came around the corner yelling, "Jordan! Jordan! Stop! Stop punching him!"

The combatants stumbled away and the girls chased after. One of them stopped when she saw me. She turned, looked at me, and said:

"Sorry, sir"

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

LOVE it!!! Sir...she clearly doesn't know you.

I'm impressed (although quite shocked) by the wine and edamame! Do you like the edamame with sea salt?

anne marie said...

how did you like dancing with the stars last night?? i agree, pussy cat doll vs. 70 year old man??? totally level competition! I'm thinking either buzz or kate (my hope) will get kicked out tonight... i am psyched for a season with some real "stars"! have a good day, sir!

Heidi said...

Sucks finding out the rest of the world thinks you're an adult, doesn't it?

Anna Palmer said...

Red or white?

Irwin Handleman said...

red

pete said...

Last week I went to a concert at a bar with some of the twentysomethings from the campus radio station I volunteer at (I'm 40) and when they started asking us for ID's I got all excited and started looking for mine until one of the bouncers looked at me strangely and said "naw, dude, it's OK". :( I did get frisked, though, so the night wasn't a total loss.